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Hi - Janet you said >i feel that i have a lot to give >it's a deep well, no chance of running dry You do have a lot to give others, & you do give so freely. You check out & find answers to people's problem, give suggestions & really do more than your part. I have the tendency of doing the same. But in my case, I will give, & do for others, to keep from looking at myself and some of the problems Ben & I are trying to work out. For example, Ben will be retiring in October of this year. Living in a parsonage for the last 11 years, we are now faced with trying to find somewhere to live. We also have animals, and while Ben would like to get rid of my dog (a border collie), I'm going to keep her. Logically I know that he makes a very good point, but I don't want to think about it & precede to push it to the back of my mind to think about later. I did the same thing when it came time to do our wills. And right now, I'm looking at a house full of "things" ...too many "things" that will not be moved to another home that I will have to disposed of...my things. Something else to push back & think about tomorrow...just call me Scarlot (sp?) O'Hara... I guess what I'm saying is that instead of confronting things head on, I stay busy doing for others. This isn't bad, but the longer I put off things, the more they eat on me, & later re-appear - somethings as depression, or anger, or frustration, or panic, or whatever. In other words, what I am saying - give of yourself (like you're doing), but be sure to keep some of that love for yourself. >maybe your own worries about anger rose to the fore >when i showed some anger of my own? I know you're right here! I have seen too much of anger, anger that can distroy instead of helping. Anger was one reason I unsubbed to two other groups this weekend...I just didn't need to listen to that stuff. Yes, I could have deleted, but, like someone said last night, I've read the whole post BEFORE I realize I should have hit the delete key instead. To be honest there were too many messages on those two lists that for me, were trite. I had planned to unsub anyhow, but when the anger arose....that was it. So I do know that my fear of anger is something I need to work out for myself. Like you said: >anger is not 'bad' per se >but it needs to be carefully monitored >as to its origins >i can't tell you how much this means to me >i truly appreciate your concern Thanks for listening, & trying to decipher what I'm saying. Anyhow, this has gotten way too long. >how are we doing so far, sis? Great, I hope!! At least I'm feeling better. Linda cg Ben 69/5 [log in to unmask]