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Full-name: MartyF25
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Date: Fri, 9 Apr 1999 20:07:54 EDT
Subject: you know your getting old if.........
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How You Know You're Not a Kid anymore:
1. You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
2. You can live without sex but not without glasses.
3. Your back goes out more than you do.
4. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the
room.
5. You buy a compass for the dash of your car.
6. You are proud of your lawnmower.
7. Your best friend is dating someone half his age...and isn't breaking
any laws.
8. You call Olan Mills before they call you.
9. Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
10. You sing along with the elevator music.
11. You would rather go to work than stay home sick.
12. You constantly talk about the price of gasoline.
13. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
14. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
15. Neighbors borrow your tools.
16. People call at 9:00 pm and ask, "Did I wake you?"
17. You have a dream about prunes.
18. You answer a question with, "Because I said so!"
19. You send money to PBS.
20. You still buy records, and you think a CD is a certificate of
deposit.
21. The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of you pants.
22. You take a metal detector to the beach.
23. You wear black socks with sandals.
24. You know what the word "equity" means.
25. You can't remember the last time you lay on the floor to watch
television.
26. You ears are hairer than your head.
27. You talk about "good grass", and you're referring to someone's lawn.
28. You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
29. You got cable for the weather channel.
30. You can go bowling without drinking.
31. You have a party, and the neighbors don't even realize it.
