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------------------------------------------------ Word Play ------------------------------------------------ Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, become known as the lesser of two weevils. Two atoms are walking down the street and they run into each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I'm positive!" Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication. A group of chess enthusiasts checked in a hotel and were standing on the mezzanine above the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting over an open foyer." A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced onthe man reading a book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows readers digest and writers cramp. There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did. An Indian goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?" The doctor replies: "It's very simple. You're two tents." A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal". The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of her other son. Her husband responds, "But they're twins--if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal. Just for fun! :-)