Jennifer: These are some of the best little puns I've heard, thanks for sharing them. I'd certainly like to use a couple in the Parkinsaw stories, suitably modified of course. For example, I could add Kayak Races to the July 4th Parka-Thon. Thanks again for these clever gems. John Bjork "Parkinsaw, MI: A View from the lighter Side of PD" Jennifer Smith wrote: > ------------------------------------------------ > Word Play > ------------------------------------------------ > Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in > > the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your > kayak and heat it too. > > Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and > became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and > never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, become known as > the > lesser of two weevils. > > Two atoms are walking down the street and they run into each other. > One > says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are > you > sure?" "Yeah, I'm positive!" > > Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain > during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication. > > A group of chess enthusiasts checked in a hotel and were standing on > the > mezzanine above the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. > After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them > to > disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, > "I > can't stand chess nuts boasting over an open foyer." > > A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to > eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a > book; > the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced > onthe man reading a book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle > knows readers digest and writers cramp. > > There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in > ten > different puns in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. > Unfortunately, no pun in ten did. > > An Indian goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these > alternating > recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a > teepee, then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with > me?" > The doctor replies: "It's very simple. You're two tents." > > A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a > > family in Egypt and is named "Amal". The other goes to a family in > Spain; > they name him "Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to > his > birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that > she > wishes she also had a picture of her other son. Her husband responds, > "But > they're twins--if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal. > > Just for fun! :-)