Lately most of the posts to the List have been on a serious note, which is as
it should be, but I feel it is time to deal with a pressing pig problem. As I
have written in previous Posts, there are distant relatives of Porky and
Porquetta living right here in Connecticut.(they have changed the spelling of
their last name to PorKEnson, but I feel that that is an affectation.)They are
residing next door to in(famous) home economics/media guru Martha
Stewart.Since we had reason to believe that they were in danger from a
mysterious stranger named ART,I engaged an undercover operative from
iSleuth.com., asper John Bjork's suggestion, to keep an eye on them.(There
were also reports from Camilla that a family of "winged" pigs, a distant
branch of the Porkinsons, were seen in Cincinnnati. I have never been to
Cincinnati but I suspect that these "angel" pigs are mutants.At least they're
not warthogs.}Getting back to the Connecticut pigs-they did not heed my
warning that Martha's next issue of her "Living" magazine was devoted to 100
ways to serve PORK!!! She was also seen blatantly eating a ham sandwich.
Apparently the PorKEnsons had lived in Westport, home of retired celebrities
like Paul Newman, for so long that they had become snobs and were unwilling to
accept John's kind offer of porcine protection in Parkinsaw and re-locate
there (or anywhere else.} But worse of all, I received a call from my
operative that the Connectocut pigs have disappeared!!!He also suspects that
an H.M.O. may be involved. As Sherlock Holmes would say, the game's afoot.
Awaiting further instructions, I remain,
(Still}Concerned Carole in Connecticut
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