Oh, How I wish I could. You don't know my mother, though. They're going. He's communicated his feelings...and I mine...but she feels it will be good for them. If he refuses and just stays home, well he won't because she wouldn't go...and then there would be a world of guilt. He won't do that to her because he knows how much she wants to go. Especially my dad...he's a born worrier about everything, and for the last couple years it's only been getting worse. He worries about me speeding, driving, walking, being too cold, too hot, about my son...and everyone else in my 22-person family. So, driving across country has got to be an enormous stress on him. But, the plans are in stone, and my mother will not change her mind (believe me.) In a message dated 6/16/99 3:46:11 PM Eastern Daylight Time, [log in to unmask] writes: << yikes sounds like torture is she in denial? he was uncomfortable long before diagnosis you can bet your booties janet ps is the trip set in stone? why not change plans? >>