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hi all At 10:11 1999/06/22 +0200, gerrit wrote, in part: >...Everyone of us have surely gone through that >situation where we thought that just MAYBE we've been misdiagnosed >and that we will be back to normal when we wake up tomorrow. >Problem is that when we wake up and find ourselves still with the >P-thing, we seem to sink even deeper into the slime and sludge we >thought we had escaped from. This is hard on the mind and plays >havoc with the emotions - and we know what THAT does.... at the risk of sounding like a broken record i have to say here that the emotional anguish of 'sinking deeper into the slime and sludge' especially if the sinking lasts months rather than days or weeks, could very well be clinical depression, a separate disorder [although it occurs frequently with pd and also prior to pd diagnosis] which is easily i said EASILY treated and is also curable i said CURABLE >... Be positive and carry the burden (for want of a better word) the >best you can and as an example to others - especially your carer - >who needs it more than you think. Life is wonderful and is much >better than the alternative. ... the distorted thinking that is cd could render the above words as just so much hogwash: "it's all right for you to say so!" "humph, that's what you think!" "who's the pollyanna?" "this burden is overwhelming me - what does he know?" "this burden is too much for me - no one else could possibly understand how i feel - there's no point in even trying to explain" "be positive! he's gotta be kidding! about what?!" >...Take up a new hobby - even if it exists only in your mind. >Have you ever tried to take virtual photographs? Imagine >you have a camera in front of your eye. Look at the stunning >cloud formations, the way the buildings interact with each >other, the specific look on the child's face the moment before >it changes into another expression. Look at the way that the >light falling on an object - especially a human form - changes >the hues and character of the object. I live within eyesight >of Table Mountain and can never grow tired of the differences in >colour, texture and moods every time I look at it. This can be >so very enriching for the mind. And the smile on your face will >appear automatically. Also the shine from within... these are beautiful images, gerrit, and i [now] react the same way to the wonders of the world around me however as some one formerly intimately acquainted [on a personal basis and also via family members] with the dank paralysing murk of clinical depression i know that if i had read these words while in the depths they would have meant not a heck of a lot to me i might have caught a glimpse of that shining light but i would have winced and turned my eyes away in pain and sorrow "it's useless" being depressed is a passing mood a reaction to real hurts and struggles clinical depression is a brain chemistry imbalance which, if untreated, can hang around for months and years its distorted thinking is self perpetuating and all encompassing but still false and distorted for all that janet adding one more perceptions post to the pile janet paterson 52 now / 41 dx / 37 onset PO Box 171 Almonte Ontario K0A 1A0 Canada a new voice http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Village/6263/ [log in to unmask]