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Just looked out the window and realized a full moon was shining over my shoulder while I sat at my computer. Gonna' go out and look at it. Carole H. --- janet paterson <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > hi all > > >At 19:24 1999/09/24 -0700, cyber-dad Don wrote: > >>i am not sure if this should have been NONPD: > >>so list and my cyber-daughter, i hope i am doing > right. > > as far as i am concerned > you can [almost] do no wrong! > > i make a point of reading every single message you > send in > regardless of the subject or the topic or whatever > and i am sure that i am not alone in this > > >>how to start? as they say in book writing, start > at the beginning. > >>i may repeat myself. mom (VIVIAN) and i had a long > talk again. > >>yes, i have been very upset. why - i don't know. > >>my neuro is away on a trip. mom called his head > nurse. > >>as all nurses know, a lot of them know the doc's > patients > >>about as well as the doc's do. > >>they both say my PD is getting worse,though i'm > not dying from it. > >>i'm just like a lot of PWP'S who ARE IN DENIAL. > >>she said i was regressing. > >>[i can't think of the word but am going > backwards]. > >>i used to be the one who could do 'anything' > >>and what i did not know was 'not worth knowing'. > >>i cry a lot about how i can't do this or that. > >>i don't want to admit i have trouble in walking or > doing any thing. > >>when someone needed help i was there. > >>now that i can't be first, i cry. > > could it be the moon? > everyone seems to be 'prickley' these days > extra sensitive extra emotional > but that might just be pd > > you didn't have a very good time at that dinner > were you disappointed that you had to leave early? > were you mad at yourself? > > if it had been someone else who choked on their > chicken > would you be mad at them? > > you say you are crying about the things you can't do > you know that that is the old grungy filter > that mr pd has on his glasses > he never cleans the darn things > he goes wallowing in the mud > gets his lenses all grimy > and then complains that the day looks dreary > > how about a good scrub > so you can see the things you ***can*** do > for a change? > > like write a heart-spilling letter like you just did > do you know how many people cannot do that? > too afraid to 'look vulnerable'? > too afraid of seeming 'weak'? > > i personally think > that the things you know and are learning now > are the things that are truly 'worth knowing' > > the other stuff is just ego flaunting > or what i have dubbed 'willie waving' > [yikes i can't believe i said that!] > > >>i have tried to tell PWP'S. we are still people > with feelings. > >>but i don't want anyone's pity. this i have got to > do for myself. > > it's one thing to feel too proud for pity > but allowing others to at least empathize with you > is a generous sharing of your humanity > > we none of us are perfect now > or ever will be > no point in wasting energy pretending we are > or whining that 'we should be' > > >>i did not know the LIST was picking up on it. mom > has. > >>she is trying to get me to be the old DON and look > after myself. > >>you see CG have it worries time with PD than us. i > forgot that. > >>i am trying to figure out why one minute i am ok, > and then an hour > >>later i'm not. i was talking to BERN . HE PICKED > UP ON IT AS WELL > >>AS a LOT OF MY VERY VERY GOOD LIST FAMILY have > picked up on it. > >>my life is to help all PWP'S in my own way from my > heart. > >>JOAN HOW CAN'T SPELL HER NAME? Joan Snyder has > made me feel good > >>because of the posts i got from her. > >>at one time i could look the big wheels in the > face > >>and read the riot act to them. > > and just what do you think you are doing now? > the big wheels have changed into your cyber-kin > and we are gaining the benefit of your e-mails to us > your words touch us all > in a way that is much more powerful > than a rip-snortin lecture > > > >>CAMILLA at the end of your post, i think in your > polite way > >>are tryng to tell me something. > >>i know i will win over this PD. > >>with the LIST & with VIVIAN'S HELP i will > >>and i pray i will be DON once more. > >>so let's all be allowed to say what we want > >>and let it settle in the dust and let the rain > take care of it. > > i love this image > have you been taking secret poetry lessons? > > >>i have been here for an hour trying what to figure > out what to say. > >>it's really nothing of importance. i've just got > to talk. > >>with so many that are having their own worries > with PD, > >>I should just shut up. > > no, you 'shouldn't' > i'm glad you didn't > > > with mush love > > sis > > > > >>I.Y.Q. > >>DON AND VIVIAN > >>LOVE OF MY LIFE FOR 54 YEARS > >> > >>BEST MEDS FOR PD > >>IS > >>FOR IT IS IN GIVING THAT WE RECEIVE > >> > >><[log in to unmask]> > >> > >><http://www.2wcoil.com/~flash> > > > janet paterson > 52 now / 41 dx / 37 onset > 613 256 8340 po box 171 almonte ontario canada K0A > 1A0 > a new voice: > <http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Village/6263/> > <[log in to unmask]> > __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? 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