hi all At 07:17 1999/11/07 -0600, paul wrote to me, in part: >... Apparently you are not familiar with truly advanced >cases of PD. My father died of complications after 13 >years. ... My mother took care of him to the very end >but you apparently do not have a clue what some >caregivers go thru. It takes a VERY special person to >cope. And, yes, it could destroy a family --- mentally. >... Death was a blessing --- but what a hell of a way to >die... hi paul, i appreciate your comments your father and your family obviously had a difficult time i was with my father as he struggled for two years with throat cancer in 1977 i was with my mother as she was overcome by heart problems in 1964 in my view perception of any situation 'tragedy' or 'blessing' is in the eye [and heart and soul] of the beholder i.e. the percept-or and is tinted by the lenses the percept-or uses to look through the old saw about 'sauces and gooses and ganders and gravies' hits the mark [even though i can't remember exactly how it goes] in the same way that the 'glass being half full or half empty' classic does >...On another subject that I have been wanting to write >to you about ----- you comment about being afraid to >have a surgery to relieve your PD. You better get over >it girl!!!! My brother says there is very little pain >involved with a biSTN... pain holds no terror for me it is other aspects of surgery that i fear, going back to childhood trauma i know that i could do some work on overcoming that fear maybe editing and posting the-hole-in-the-head-gang-stories is part of that work [?!] my views on tragedies and blessings and surgeries and illness are created and coloured by me and my experiences and by the way i choose to interpret them the fact that i had a choice was not apparent to me most of my life until i read m. scott peck's declaration 'life is difficult' in 'the road less traveled' that shift in perception ['the scales fell from my eyes'] was the catalyst for a significant change in my 'lens prescription' going all the way back to april 1990 when i thought the bottom of my world had fallen out from under me not because of my pd diagnosis 18 months earlier but because of my discovery [piled on top of several other losses] that my four month old [first] marriage had been a mistake and was over we are where we have been janet janet paterson 52 now / 41 dx / 37 onset e-mail - [log in to unmask] web-site - http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Village/6263/