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At 22:51 1999/12/21 -0500, hilary wrote: >i look at my son >has his life been ruined >at 18, SAT score 1570, >yet he cant keep up > with a 2nd string college - part time -- >too stressed out to cope with exams and deadlines - > Give him a chance to be a kid >let him goof off. >My 14 yr old looks at a bottle of pills, and her > 16 yr old sister moves out of home. >Am i a monster - no! >Neither was their father. >But how many survive the stress of two parents >debilitatingly stricken >before their time. maybe 'before their time' is a mis-take? maybe 'the right time' doesn't exist? maybe we don't make the 'schedule'? >At nine he was helping his mentally ill father >fight aginst foreclosure >his friends were playing ball. >six weeks after barmitzvah he was saying kaddish , >praying for a dead father, >thankful that his cancer was so quick. maybe he is learning other things? maybe he needs to, in order to be what he will become? maybe his role in this gigantic repertory theatre is a unique one? >Dont study , dont get a job, indulge your needs >says the therapist (paid by the county) >I dont hav e the money to support him >and the socialworker poinsts out that >he willl lose the medicaid we're trying to claim - > to pay for the surgery he needs. >Or work to get insurance - and , >like his father, face a mental collapse instead maybe the toughest tests are handed out to those able to learn from them? mayne the lack of money indicates that something else might do instead? maybe the doom forecasters are / will be wrong? maybe the alternatives are shades of gray? >What can i do , child of my heart >G-d gave you to me take care of. >now i just lack the money, but soon >i'll be needing somebody to care for me >who will that be? >and who will take care of you and your sister >when i am no longer there? >hilary blue (50/33/24) maybe he was given to you so you could set him free? maybe you are being watched over by the same spirit? maybe we all are? jmp janet paterson 52 now / 41 dx / 37 onset http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Village/6263/ 613 256 8340 po box 171 almonte ontario canada k0a 1a0