wonderful
wish i could come
judy


>From: Barb_MSN <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: Parkinson's Information Exchange Network
><[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: NONPD: Pet Haikus
>Date: Thu, 27 Apr 2000 12:52:31 -0700
>
>Darwin....
>
>I've been laughing SOOO hard at the "Pet Haikus," that a neighbor
>came over to make sure I was OK!
>
>She has four cats, so I printed her a copy of the Haikus and I
>thought she'd CROAK from laughter.
>
>A coupla gals who live nearby my condo were walking their pups
>nearby and were drawn to our laughter.  Since I couldn't get a
>word out without bursting into guffaws, I printer out hard copies
>for THEM, too!
>
>Pretty soon there was a whole buncha folks standing in front of my
>condo howling in laughter!!!
>
>Since my mama didn't raise a fool, I figured what a great way to
>meet some of my new neighbors, so I ran to the fridge, grabbed a
>Sara Lee cheese cake, them whipped up a pitcher of lemonade, and
>hosted an impromptu party
>
>Watch out!  They're all heading to YOUR home NOW! <giggling>
>
>Barb Mallut
>[log in to unmask]
>-----Original Message-----
>From: Hawkins, Darwin <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]>
>Date: Thursday, April 27, 2000 11:54 AM
>Subject: NONPD: Pet Haikus
>
>
> >For all you cat lovers, and the dog lovers get equal time!
> >
> >
> >> Cat Haikus
> >>
> >> You never feed me.
> >> Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
> >> That will show you.
> >>
> >> You must scratch me there!
> >> Yes, above my tail! Behold,
> >> Elevator butt.
> >>
> >> I need a new toy.
> >> Tail of black dog keeps good time.
> >> Pounce! good dog! good dog!
> >>
> >> The rule for today:
> >> Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
> >> New rule tomorrow.
> >>
> >> In deep sleep hear sound
> >> Cat throwup hairball somewhere
> >> Will find in morning
> >>
> >> Grace personified,
> >> I leap into the window.
> >> I meant to do that.
> >>
> >> Blur of motion, then --
> >> Silence, me, a paper bag.
> >> What is so funny?
> >>
> >> The mighty hunter
> >> Returns with gifts of plump birds --
> >> Your foot just squashed one
> >>
> >> You're always typing.
> >> Well, let's see you ignore my
> >> Sitting on your hands.
> >>
> >> My small cardboard box.
> >> You cannot see me if I
> >> Can hide my head.
> >>
> >> Terrible battle.
> >> I fought for hours. Come and see!
> >> What's a 'term paper'?
> >>
> >> Kitty likes plastic
> >> Confuses for litter box
> >> Shouldn't leave around
> >>
> >> Small brave carnivores
> >> Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
> >> Fear vacuum cleaner
> >>
> >> Want to trim my claws?
> >> Don't even think about it!
> >> My cries will wake dead.
> >>
> >> I want to be close
> >> To you. Can I fit my head
> >> inside your armpit?
> >>
> >> Want to go outside.
> >> Oh, no! Help! I got outside!
> >> Let me back inside!
> >>
> >> Oh no! Big One
> >> has been trapped by newspaper!
> >> Cat to the rescue!
> >>
> >> Cats meow out of angst
> >> "Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!
> >> We could break so much!"
> >>
> >> Litter box not here
> >> You must have moved it again
> >> I'll go in the sink.
> >>
> >> The Big Ones snore now
> >> Every room is dark and cold
> >> Time for "Cup Hockey"
> >>
> >> We're almost equals
> >> I purr to show I love you
> >> Want to smell my butt?
> >>
> >> ***********************
> >>
> >>       Dog Haikus
> >>
> >> I love my master;
> >> Thus I perfume myself with
> >> This rotten squirrel.
> >>
> >> I lie belly-up
> >> In the sunshine, happier
> >> Than you'll ever be.
> >>
> >> Today I have sniffed
> >> Twelve dog butts. I celebrate
> >> By licking your face.
> >>
> >> I sound the alarm!
> >> Paperboy! He'll kill us all!
> >> Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
> >>
> >> I sound the alarm!
> >> Garbage man! He'll kill us all!
> >> Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
> >>
> >> How do I love thee?
> >> The ways are as many as
> >> My hairs on the rug.
> >>
> >> My human is home!
> >> I am so ecstatic I have
> >> Made him a puddle.
> >>
> >> I Hate my choke chain.
> >> Look, world, they strangle me! Ack
> >> Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!
> >>
> >> Look in these eyes and
> >> Deny it. No human could
> >> Love you more than me.
> >>
> >> The cat is not all
> >> Bad--she fills the litter box
> >> With sweet Tootsie Rolls.
> >>
> >> Dig under fence--why?
> >> Because it's there. Because it's
> >> There. Because it's there.
> >>
> >> I am your best friend,
> >> Now, forever, and always
> >> When you are eating.
> >>
> >> You may call them fleas,
> >> But they are far more--I call
> >> Them a vocation.
> >>
> >>

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