Rick, I think it is only natural to think "it can't happen to me" when it is
only a breath away.  Even when you're well and try to have compassion it is
difficult to really understand.  Unfortunately I am  not one of those people
who is ennobled by suffering.or who feels my life has been blessed by
disease.  I think we also have the added burden of making others feel
comfortable around us.  I know my cousin's son who had cystic fibrosis did
that and his whole life was spent trying to stay alive.  Whenever I go "out"
I try to explain about it, especially the brain surgery, which astounds
people. This story will be on CNN.com in London soon and I will post when
and website.My rant for the day.Ray
----- Original Message -----
From: "Rick McGirr" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, November 03, 2005 9:38 AM
Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All/Rick


> Kathleen, thank you very much for your words of support.  After all,
> yes I could complain.  We all could.  I have this list and my shrink
> for that.  But every day I am reminded of all the people who love me
> and are pulling for me, and of all the relative material wealth I
> have.  No, not rich, but I live in a roomy house, etc.  I have skills.
> I have a good credit score.  I have options.
>
> I remember before PD, I was at the store and there was this old guy
> who obviously had something like PD.  His hand was wagging like a
> tail, and he was having difficulty, moving slowly.  I remember the
> pity and the revulsion that I felt, and the fervent wish, not granted,
> that I would avoid such a maddening and frustrating state.  Well, now
> that I'm inside it, I don't want people to feel that way about me.  I
> just want people to interact with me normally, to ignore my problems
> and not treat me like a freak, not ostracize me, nor to defer to my
> difficulty or pamper me.  If I knew then what I know now, I might have
> at least said 'howdy' to that guy.  In the Buffalo vernacular that
> would read 'haya doo-un'.  But I remember, when I was younger, not
> wanting anything to do with people who weren't 'cool', wanting to move
> fast and not be burdened or slowed down or to have to even think about
> disabilities and people afflicted with them.  Seems like ages ago
> already.  Image is much more important to the young.  Now I couldn't
> care less how people judge me in a social context, because I now know
> that that stuff is very superficial.  My concern remains that as a
> person who is often on a stage somewhere, that my colleagues on stage
> will shun me for considerations of image.  Def Leopard tried to stick
> with their drummer after he lost his arm in a car crash.  Fickle fans
> wouldn't go for it.  I must say that having PD has opened my eyes to
> the fact that there are real people inside these malfunctioning
> bodies, with invaluable stories to tell.  I see people differently
> now.  The healthy ones don't appreciate how fragile their image and
> their independence are, nor do they realize the depth and breadth that
> still glows in the hearts of the afflicted.  Adversity does enrich
> your outlook.
>
> So that's my rant for today.  Thanks again.
>
> Enjoy Fall!
> Rick McGirr
> Email: [log in to unmask]
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Kathleen Cochran" <[log in to unmask]>
> To: <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: Wednesday, November 02, 2005 8:42 AM
> Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All/Rick
>
>
>> Rick,
>>
>> I haven't been talking much on the list lately because I, like you,
>> am scurrying to earn while I can. Your remark below about people
>> feeling uncomfortable with your wobbliness caught my eye.
>>
>> I have mostly stopped worrying about whether people notice my
>> trermor or not. Strangers' level of comfort with my condition is not
>> my concern. It does help, if I'm with people I know or work with, to
>> tell them I have PD. Then they know what's going on, and I don't
>> have to wonder what they're wondering.
>>
>> I like to think that one day PD will go the way of polio. Someone
>> will luck out, the break will come, and it'll be over.
>>
>> Sooner rather than later would be good.... In the meantime, hang in.
>> Sounds like you're doing very, very well.
>>
>> Kathleen
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Rick McGirr <[log in to unmask]>
>> To: [log in to unmask]
>> Sent:         Tue, 1 Nov 2005 07:51:36 -0500
>> Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All/Rick
>>
>>   Them's the breaks. I'm alright. Can't lay down and take it. Gotta
>> fight. Gotta keep going. Gotta have faith. We'll win out. Something
>> good'll happen. You wait n see. OK?
>> Rick ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "rayilynlee" <[log in to unmask]> To:
>> <[log in to unmask]> Sent: Wednesday, October 26, 2005
>> 10:52 PM Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All/Rick
>> > Rick, here I was bemoaning the loss of a hobby, not a profession.
>> > Well, I can't teach any more either, but it really brings home to
>> > me the outrage of the wait for help from Singapore or South Korea.
>> > I "dance" on the treadmill but it is getting kind of pitiful. I
>> > was 60 when I got PD, you are way too young to have it. It just
>> > breaks my heart. ((((Rick)))) from Ray ----- Original
>> > Message -----
>> > From: "Rick McGirr" <[log in to unmask]> To:
>> > <[log in to unmask]> Sent: Tuesday, October 25, 2005
>> > 6:10 AM Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All
>> >>I think if I was a major league ball player, I wouldn't be one of
>> >>the noble greats who leave the game before they have to. I would
>> >>play until I couldn't make a team, just for the love of the game.
>> >>What do you mean? No, the $3 million a year has nothing to do with
>> >>it! Actually, Scott, the thing that's getting me down a bit right
>> >>now is the fact that I have so many commitments, most having to do
>> >>with bringing in a few bucks, that I can't work on my playing the
>> >>way I need to. I can still get through a rock or blues gig fine.
>> >>Most of that stuff is 'flash and trash', as my college prof used
>> >>to say. 'But I like it, like it, yes I do!' I feel like I still
>> >>have some years left before I can't fake it anymore. I find that
>> >>the individual identity of each finger is what's diminishing, ever
>> >>so slowly. But I still have the 'groove', and if you have that,
>> >>you can rock til you're blue in the mouth. But actually, there's a
>> >>bigger fear than playing wrong notes in public (like that's never
>> >>happened before). I think about being a spectacle off stage. If I
>> >>had to hang around numerous venues between sets and waddle and
>> >>wobble and wiggle, which I do a little bit now, it would be hard
>> >>for people and me to feel comfortable with it. (Hey! This could be
>> >>a way to get people to move my gear for me!) This would lead to me
>> >>explaining myself and PD quite a bit, which wouldn't be the worst
>> >>thing politically, but the bar owner might look a bit perturbed
>> >>(like that's never happened before). Once it gets back to the
>> >>booking agent, then you have a problem, 'cause word, like rot,
>> >>would spread around town fast, and then the phone stops ringing
>> >>and you're done. I have a bunch of piano students, and pretty soon
>> >>I'm going to have to tell them why my arm shakes during lessons.
>> >>I'll have to start sitting behind them while they play, instead of
>> >>beside them. I short, I may be going down, but I'm going to take
>> >>as many of them with me as I can. And afterwards, my son can
>> >>entertain me. We have similar, broad tastes, (Hey, get your mind
>> >>out of the gutter!) and he's recently done his first few
>> >>decent-paying gigs with a band. I am blessed with a wonderful wife
>> >>and family, so I'm sure I'll be fine, whatever happens to me
>> >>professionally. I also think of my mom, a painter, who had her
>> >>abilities taken away by a stroke a few years back. She's in a home
>> >>now, and they've been trying to encourage her to try some
>> >>sketching with her left (non-dominant) hand, and she's been doing
>> >>a bit. Such a struggle for her. I got it great in comparison.
>> >>Enjoy Fall! Rick McGirr Email: [log in to unmask] -----
>> >>Original Message -----
>> >> From: "Scott E. Antes" <[log in to unmask]> To:
>> >> <[log in to unmask]> Sent: Monday, October 24, 2005
>> >> 1:42 PM Subject: Re: PD/artistic ability/All
>> >>> Hi Ray and Rick and All. Out of town over the weekend, and saw
>> >>> this message first. I, too, would like to know if more of our
>> >>> list members are musical/artistic--or if anyone knows of PD
>> >>> people who are artistic. Laureen (my wife) doesn't really talk
>> >>> about not playing piano/organ any more. It's only been few
>> >>> months since she stopped--and she stopped when she felt (not
>> >>> anyone else)her abilites were going downhill. Scott
>> >>>>===== Original Message From "Parkinson's Information Exchange
>> >>>>Network"
>> >>> <[log in to unmask]> =====
>> >>>>Scott, interesting idea. Well we have Rick, our hip, humorous
>> >>>>musician. Some people thought I played a pretty mean piano, but
>> >>>>I knew enough about music to know I didn't know anything. Have
>> >>>>small hands and was too lazy to practice too. Years ago my
>> >>>>musician teacher of 3 months asked me to "sit in for him" at an
>> >>>>almost empty piano bar. I froze with fear. Does it bother your
>> >>>>wife like it does me that she can't play any more? PD is such an
>> >>>>awful thief. Also could paint copies of great art, but nothing
>> >>>>original. I wonder who else on our List has/had artistic
>> >>>>abilities. Ray
>> >>>
>> >>> Scott E. Antes Department of Anthropology Northern Arizona
>> >>> University Flagstaff, AZ 86011-5200
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