Gas Explosion Kills Dozens
 
A mysterious mid-morning gas explosion occurred in the Brady Amnesia
Medical Center this morning. The cause of the blast is being investigated.
A survivor who  describes herself as a "caretaker for a neurological
patient" was said to have repeated one word over and over to the medical
personnel attending her injuries: "fava". Investigations will continue.
 
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NEW and IMPROVED Cinn-a-mint
A breakthrough in the world of neurology and breath fresheners
 
(Scene opens on young man in frozen state lying next to a beautiful woman
in middle-America-esque bedroom)
 
"Has this ever happened to you? You awaken to the sun shining through your
window with your special someone next to you and you know you have
early-morning halitosis..not not to mention the fact that your body craves
dopamine. And we all know that the bradykinesia will give way to tremors
when we try to make it to the bathroom and try in vain to hold the
toothpaste tube (more or less squeeze it)....and who feels like stabbing or
scraping their gums with a toothbrush first thing in the morning??!"
 
Well now there's Cinn-A-Mint, the new dopamine supplement and breath
freshener all-in-one! Just pop a Cinn-A-Mint when you wake up in the
morning and you'll be symptom-free and have kissable breath in no time.
 
@Cinn-A-Mint is a product of the Certs-Roche Co, Inc.
 
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Conversational snippets overheard at latest YOP conference
 
"....and I told the doctor, "I've always considered myself a very impotent
person"
 
....he certainly had a strong handshake for such an old man"
 
....."is that dyskinesia or are you just glad to see me?"
 
....."I think she likes me; she's been staring at me all evening!"
 
......"we take drugs pretty seriously at our house"..
 
....."hey, looks like somebody got their prescription filled recently!"
 
........and I said to her, "As long as you're feeling dyskinetic, how 'bout
getting started on that butter-churning"?
 
..........so I asked him, "Why don't we go to your place and you can show
me all those child-proof containers you're always talking about?"
 
 
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Earth report:
 
A 4.0 earthquake struck the town  of Idiopathic, CA at approximately 7:12
AM this morning. A resident, Davis Booth, when asked if he felt the
earthquake, replied "Yes, I definitely felt some tremors". Mr. Booth
appeared visibly shaken.
 
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Television Corner
 
(Last week, we asked the readers to submit a revised version of a popular
TV theme-song based on their favorite neurological disease. The winning
entry was by Eileen A-Lot.
 
*Sufferers of PD may find the following parody devoid of any redeeming
social content. This viewpoint will probably change as their medicine kicks
in    -Editor
 
(to the tune of The Brady Bunch)
 
There's a kinesia
and we call it Brady
that will keep you
from moving on your own
 
You need some stimuli
something to catch your eye
How will you reach the phone?
 
There's a kinesia
and we call it Dys-sy
that will give you
more movement than you've known
 
They're just two of
the many symptoms
that some of us now own
 
But then one day
when the symptoms get too many
And  you feel that you're
about to give up hope
 
Grab that noose
and crawl down off the table
Be-cause we all know that
that's a waste of rope
 
The PD-blues
the PD-blues
When will we learn to lose those PD-blues?!
 
Note: Any person(s) or style of humor simliar to that of the  Editor is
strictly intentional.
Feedback is welcome (direct or to group)