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Dear List: This is a copy of Vonnegut's actual 1994 commencement address =
at Syracuse U.

Greg Leeman



Kurt Vonnegut=20

Speech to Class of 1994: Syracuse University Commencement=20

Sunday, May 8th, 1994=20

There are three things that I very much want to say to the Class of 1994 =
in this brief

hail and farewell. They are things which haven=92t been said enough to =
you freshly

minted graduates nor to your parents or guardians, nor to me, nor to =
your teachers.

I will say these in the body of my speech, I=92m just setting you up for =
this.=20

First, I will say thank you. Second, I will say I am truly sorry - now =
that is the

striking novelty among the three. We live in a time when nobody ever =
seems to

apologize for anything; they just weep and raise hell on the Oprah =
Winfrey Show.

The third thing I want to say to you at some point - probably close to =
the end - is,

"We love you." Now if I fail to say any of those three things in the =
body of this great

speech, hold up your hands, and I will remedy the deficiency.=20

And I=92m going to ask you to hold up your hands this early in the =
proceedings for

another reason. I first declare to you that the most wonderful thing, =
the most

valuable thing you can get from an education is this - the memory of one =
person

who could really teach, whose lessons made life and yourselves much more

interesting and full of possibilities than you had previously supposed =
possible. I

ask this of everyone here, including all of us up here on the platform - =
How many of

us, how many of you, had such a teacher? Kindergarten counts. Please =
hold up

your hands. Hurry. You may want to remember the name of that great =
teacher.=20

I thank you for being educated. There, I=92ve thanked you now; that way =
I don=92t have

to speak to a bunch of nincompoops. For you freshly minted college =
graduates,

this is a puberty ceremony long overdue. We, whose principal achievement =
is that

we are older than you, have to acknowledge at last that you are =
grown-ups, too.=20

there are old poops possibly among us on this very day who will say that =
you are

not grown-ups until you have somehow survived, as they have, some famous

calamity - The Great Depression, World War II, Vietnam, whatever. =
Storytellers are

responsible for this destructive, not to say suicidal, myth. Again and =
again in

stories, after some terrible mess, the character is able to say at last, =
"Today, I am

a woman; today I am a man. The end."=20

When I got home from World War II, my Uncle Dan clapped me on the back, =
and

he said, "You=92re a man now." So I killed him. Not really, but I =
certainly felt like

doing it.=20

Now you young twerps want a new name for your generation? Probably not, =
you

just want jobs, right? Well, the media do us all such tremendous favors =
when they

call you Generation X, right? Two clicks from the very end of the =
alphabet. I hereby

declare you Generation A, as much at the beginning of a series of =
astonishing

triumphs and failures as Adam and Eve were so long ago.=20

I apologize. I said I would apologize; I apologize now. I apologize =
because of the

terrible mess the planet is in. But it has always been a mess. There =
have never

been any "Good Old Days," there have just been days. And as I say to my

grandchildren, "Don=92t look at me. I just got here myself."=20

So you know what I=92m going to do? I declare everybody here a member of

Generation A. Tomorrow is another day for all of us.=20

Having said that, I have made us, for a few hours at least, what most of =
us do not

have and what we need so desperately - I have made us an extended =
family, one

for all and all for one. A husband, a wife and some kids is not a =
family; it=92s a terribly

vulnerable survival unit. Now those of you who get married or are =
married, when you

fight with your spouse, what each of you will be saying to the other one =
actually is,

"You=92re not enough people. You=92re only one person. I should have =
hundreds of

people around."=20

I met a man and a wife in Nigeria - Ibos. They just had a new baby. They =
had a

thousand relatives there in southern Nigeria, and they were going to =
take that baby

around and visit all the other relatives. We should all have families =
like that.=20

Now, you take Dan and Marilyn Quayle, who imagine themselves as a brave,

clean-cut little couple. They are surrounded by an enormous extended =
family, what

we should all have - I mean judges, senators, newspaper editors, =
lawyers, bankers.

They are not alone. And one reason they are so comfortable is that they =
are

members of extended families, and I would really, over the long run, =
hope America

would find some way to provide all of our citizens with extended =
families - a large

group of people they could call on for help.=20

Now, I=92ve made us an extended family. Does our family have a flag? =
Well, you

bet. It=92s a big orange rectangle. Orange is a very good color and =
maybe the best

one. It=92s full of vitamin C and cheerful associations, if one could =
forget the troubles

in Ireland.=20

Now this gathering is a work of art. The teacher whose name I mentioned =
when we

all remembered good teachers asked me one time, "What is it artists do?" =
And I

mumbled something. "They do two things," he said. "First, they admit =
they can=92t

straighten out the whole universe. And then second, they make at least =
one little

part of it exactly as it should be. A blob of clay, a square of canvas, =
a piece of

paper, or whatever." We have all worked so hard and well to make these =
moments

and this place exactly what it should be.=20

As I have told you, I had a bad uncle named Dan, who said a male can=92t =
be a man

unless he=92d gone to war. But I had a good uncle named Alex, who said, =
when life

was most agreeable - and it could be just a pitcher of lemonade in the =
shade - he

would say, "If this isn=92t nice, what is?" So I say that about what we =
have achieved

here right now. If he hadn=92t said that so regularly, maybe five or six =
times a month,

we might not have paused to notice how rewarding life can be sometimes. =
Perhaps

my good uncle Alex will live on in some of you members of the Syracuse =
Class of

1994 if, in the future, you will pause to say out loud every so often, =
"If this isn=92t

nice, what is?"=20

Now, my time is up and I haven=92t even inspired you with heroic tales =
of the past -

Teddy Roosevelt=92s cavalry charge up San Juan Hill, Desert Storm - nor =
given you

visions of a glorious future - computer programs, interactive TV, the =
information

superhighway, speed the day. I spent too much time celebrating this very =
moment

and place - once the future we dreamed of so long ago. This is it. =
We=92re here. How

the heck did we do it?=20

A neighbor of mine, I hired him - he was a handyman - to build and "L" =
on my

house where I could write. He did the whole damn thing - he built the =
foundation,

and then the side walls and the roof. He did it all by himself. And when =
it was all

done, he stood back and he aid, "How the hell did I ever do that?" How =
the hell did

we ever do this? We did it! And if this isn=92t nice, what is?=20

I got a letter from a sappy woman a while back - she knew I was sappy =
too, which

is to say a lifelong Democrat. She was pregnant, and she wanted to know =
if I

thought it was a mistake to bring a little baby into a world as troubled =
as this one

is. And I replied, what made being alive almost worthwhile for me was =
the saints I

met. They could be almost anywhere. By saints I meant people who behaved

decently and honorably in societies which were so often obscene. Perhaps =
many

of us here, regardless of our ages or power or wealth, can be saints for =
her child to

meet.=20

There was one thing I forgot to say, and I promised I would say, ant =
that is, "We

love you. We really do."=20


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<DIV>
<P><FONT color=3D#000000 size=3D2>Dear List: This is a copy of =
Vonnegut's actual=20
1994 commencement address at Syracuse U.</FONT></P>
<P><FONT color=3D#000000 size=3D2>Greg Leeman</FONT>&nbsp;</P>
<P>&nbsp;</P>
<P>Kurt Vonnegut </P>
<P>Speech to Class of 1994: Syracuse University Commencement </P>
<P>Sunday, May 8th, 1994 </P>
<P>There are three things that I very much want to say to the Class of =
1994 in=20
this brief</P>
<P>hail and farewell. They are things which haven&rsquo;t been said =
enough to=20
you freshly</P>
<P>minted graduates nor to your parents or guardians, nor to me, nor to =
your=20
teachers.</P>
<P>I will say these in the body of my speech, I&rsquo;m just setting you =
up for=20
this. </P>
<P>First, I will say thank you. Second, I will say I am truly sorry - =
now that=20
is the</P>
<P>striking novelty among the three. We live in a time when nobody ever =
seems=20
to</P>
<P>apologize for anything; they just weep and raise hell on the Oprah =
Winfrey=20
Show.</P>
<P>The third thing I want to say to you at some point - probably close =
to the=20
end - is,</P>
<P>&quot;We love you.&quot; Now if I fail to say any of those three =
things in=20
the body of this great</P>
<P>speech, hold up your hands, and I will remedy the deficiency. </P>
<P>And I&rsquo;m going to ask you to hold up your hands this early in =
the=20
proceedings for</P>
<P>another reason. I first declare to you that the most wonderful thing, =
the=20
most</P>
<P>valuable thing you can get from an education is this - the memory of =
one=20
person</P>
<P>who could really teach, whose lessons made life and yourselves much =
more</P>
<P>interesting and full of possibilities than you had previously =
supposed=20
possible. I</P>
<P>ask this of everyone here, including all of us up here on the =
platform - How=20
many of</P>
<P>us, how many of you, had such a teacher? Kindergarten counts. Please =
hold=20
up</P>
<P>your hands. Hurry. You may want to remember the name of that great =
teacher.=20
</P>
<P>I thank you for being educated. There, I&rsquo;ve thanked you now; =
that way I=20
don&rsquo;t have</P>
<P>to speak to a bunch of nincompoops. For you freshly minted college=20
graduates,</P>
<P>this is a puberty ceremony long overdue. We, whose principal =
achievement is=20
that</P>
<P>we are older than you, have to acknowledge at last that you are =
grown-ups,=20
too. </P>
<P>there are old poops possibly among us on this very day who will say =
that you=20
are</P>
<P>not grown-ups until you have somehow survived, as they have, some =
famous</P>
<P>calamity - The Great Depression, World War II, Vietnam, whatever.=20
Storytellers are</P>
<P>responsible for this destructive, not to say suicidal, myth. Again =
and again=20
in</P>
<P>stories, after some terrible mess, the character is able to say at =
last,=20
&quot;Today, I am</P>
<P>a woman; today I am a man. The end.&quot; </P>
<P>When I got home from World War II, my Uncle Dan clapped me on the =
back,=20
and</P>
<P>he said, &quot;You&rsquo;re a man now.&quot; So I killed him. Not =
really, but=20
I certainly felt like</P>
<P>doing it. </P>
<P>Now you young twerps want a new name for your generation? Probably =
not,=20
you</P>
<P>just want jobs, right? Well, the media do us all such tremendous =
favors when=20
they</P>
<P>call you Generation X, right? Two clicks from the very end of the =
alphabet. I=20
hereby</P>
<P>declare you Generation A, as much at the beginning of a series of=20
astonishing</P>
<P>triumphs and failures as Adam and Eve were so long ago. </P>
<P>I apologize. I said I would apologize; I apologize now. I apologize =
because=20
of the</P>
<P>terrible mess the planet is in. But it has always been a mess. There =
have=20
never</P>
<P>been any &quot;Good Old Days,&quot; there have just been days. And as =
I say=20
to my</P>
<P>grandchildren, &quot;Don&rsquo;t look at me. I just got here =
myself.&quot;=20
</P>
<P>So you know what I&rsquo;m going to do? I declare everybody here a =
member=20
of</P>
<P>Generation A. Tomorrow is another day for all of us. </P>
<P>Having said that, I have made us, for a few hours at least, what most =
of us=20
do not</P>
<P>have and what we need so desperately - I have made us an extended =
family,=20
one</P>
<P>for all and all for one. A husband, a wife and some kids is not a =
family;=20
it&rsquo;s a terribly</P>
<P>vulnerable survival unit. Now those of you who get married or are =
married,=20
when you</P>
<P>fight with your spouse, what each of you will be saying to the other =
one=20
actually is,</P>
<P>&quot;You&rsquo;re not enough people. You&rsquo;re only one person. I =
should=20
have hundreds of</P>
<P>people around.&quot; </P>
<P>I met a man and a wife in Nigeria - Ibos. They just had a new baby. =
They had=20
a</P>
<P>thousand relatives there in southern Nigeria, and they were going to =
take=20
that baby</P>
<P>around and visit all the other relatives. We should all have families =
like=20
that. </P>
<P>Now, you take Dan and Marilyn Quayle, who imagine themselves as a =
brave,</P>
<P>clean-cut little couple. They are surrounded by an enormous extended =
family,=20
what</P>
<P>we should all have - I mean judges, senators, newspaper editors, =
lawyers,=20
bankers.</P>
<P>They are not alone. And one reason they are so comfortable is that =
they=20
are</P>
<P>members of extended families, and I would really, over the long run, =
hope=20
America</P>
<P>would find some way to provide all of our citizens with extended =
families - a=20
large</P>
<P>group of people they could call on for help. </P>
<P>Now, I&rsquo;ve made us an extended family. Does our family have a =
flag?=20
Well, you</P>
<P>bet. It&rsquo;s a big orange rectangle. Orange is a very good color =
and maybe=20
the best</P>
<P>one. It&rsquo;s full of vitamin C and cheerful associations, if one =
could=20
forget the troubles</P>
<P>in Ireland. </P>
<P>Now this gathering is a work of art. The teacher whose name I =
mentioned when=20
we</P>
<P>all remembered good teachers asked me one time, &quot;What is it =
artists=20
do?&quot; And I</P>
<P>mumbled something. &quot;They do two things,&quot; he said. =
&quot;First, they=20
admit they can&rsquo;t</P>
<P>straighten out the whole universe. And then second, they make at =
least one=20
little</P>
<P>part of it exactly as it should be. A blob of clay, a square of =
canvas, a=20
piece of</P>
<P>paper, or whatever.&quot; We have all worked so hard and well to make =
these=20
moments</P>
<P>and this place exactly what it should be. </P>
<P>As I have told you, I had a bad uncle named Dan, who said a male =
can&rsquo;t=20
be a man</P>
<P>unless he&rsquo;d gone to war. But I had a good uncle named Alex, who =
said,=20
when life</P>
<P>was most agreeable - and it could be just a pitcher of lemonade in =
the shade=20
- he</P>
<P>would say, &quot;If this isn&rsquo;t nice, what is?&quot; So I say =
that about=20
what we have achieved</P>
<P>here right now. If he hadn&rsquo;t said that so regularly, maybe five =
or six=20
times a month,</P>
<P>we might not have paused to notice how rewarding life can be =
sometimes.=20
Perhaps</P>
<P>my good uncle Alex will live on in some of you members of the =
Syracuse Class=20
of</P>
<P>1994 if, in the future, you will pause to say out loud every so =
often,=20
&quot;If this isn&rsquo;t</P>
<P>nice, what is?&quot; </P>
<P>Now, my time is up and I haven&rsquo;t even inspired you with heroic =
tales of=20
the past -</P>
<P>Teddy Roosevelt&rsquo;s cavalry charge up San Juan Hill, Desert Storm =
- nor=20
given you</P>
<P>visions of a glorious future - computer programs, interactive TV, the =

information</P>
<P>superhighway, speed the day. I spent too much time celebrating this =
very=20
moment</P>
<P>and place - once the future we dreamed of so long ago. This is it.=20
We&rsquo;re here. How</P>
<P>the heck did we do it? </P>
<P>A neighbor of mine, I hired him - he was a handyman - to build and=20
&quot;L&quot; on my</P>
<P>house where I could write. He did the whole damn thing - he built the =

foundation,</P>
<P>and then the side walls and the roof. He did it all by himself. And =
when it=20
was all</P>
<P>done, he stood back and he aid, &quot;How the hell did I ever do =
that?&quot;=20
How the hell did</P>
<P>we ever do this? We did it! And if this isn&rsquo;t nice, what is? =
</P>
<P>I got a letter from a sappy woman a while back - she knew I was sappy =
too,=20
which</P>
<P>is to say a lifelong Democrat. She was pregnant, and she wanted to =
know if=20
I</P>
<P>thought it was a mistake to bring a little baby into a world as =
troubled as=20
this one</P>
<P>is. And I replied, what made being alive almost worthwhile for me was =
the=20
saints I</P>
<P>met. They could be almost anywhere. By saints I meant people who =
behaved</P>
<P>decently and honorably in societies which were so often obscene. =
Perhaps=20
many</P>
<P>of us here, regardless of our ages or power or wealth, can be saints =
for her=20
child to</P>
<P>meet. </P>
<P>There was one thing I forgot to say, and I promised I would say, ant =
that is,=20
&quot;We</P>
<P>love you. We really do.&quot; </P></DIV></BODY></HTML>

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