David Boots, former List member is one of the most gifted describers of
the Parkinson's condition I know.  He captures at least for me the pain,
embarrassment as well as the black  humor of at least what I have
experienced with PD. He has chosen not to continue as a listmember but I
have remained in contact with him episodically during his absence.  His
stories about Chris Kinesia are  often bleak but also humorous and at
times uplifting. He penned the following PD story. (as he did
last year for Camilla's group) and at my request gave permission for me
to send it to the List. Chris Kinesia is a character of his that first
appeared on the List on 2/4/97.

If you want to contact David regarding this or any other matter, he can
be reached at [log in to unmask]

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"May I have this dance?"

He strode confidently into the party catching the eyes of several women in
the room. He felt great at the moment, the medication was working just
right for a night of fun and frolic. He was "on" and several people stopped
and told him how good he looked. Chris just beamed and thanked them in a
warm even voice. He made his way to the open bar in the far corner just as
someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Chris?"
He turned around and saw his old girlfriend, Ann O' Reksia.
"Ann, how have you been? he said (noting how she still seemed too skinny).
"Good...gosh, Chris, you sure look like you're doing better these days" she
gushed.

Chris Kinesia hesitated briefly before answering. It's true that his
medicinal intake had finally become regulated and also included vitamins
and homeopathic additions. But attitude and determination had also played
major roles in this change as well. He resolved never to give up hope that
someone would find a cure in his lifetime.

"Thanks" he replied "I'm watching what I eat and try to exercise some each
day".
He continued "Are you and.."?
"No, we gave up on trying to make things work...hey, can we talk about
something else?"
"Sure" he said "would you like to dance?"

Ann extended her hand and he led her on to the dance floor. They moved from
memory as the music took them back in time when everything had seemed a lot
more simple. She felt wonderful in his arms and during the slow dances, she
held him close as his cheek caressed her hair. He didn't want this night to
end and told her so. She responded by holding him even tighter as the music
played.

"Chris, you don't realize how hard it was for me to break up with you. I
don't know if it was the PD causing you to lash out at me and others close
to you but it scared me. And now, you remind me of the Chris I fell in love
with years ago...warm, self-assured, and friendly. Tell me this is real,
tell me that we can work things out this time".

"Ann, I still have PD but it's basically under control now. I've done a lot
of work on my health and my attitude and feel I have emerged a better
person for my efforts. When I was in the middle of it, I was too
self-absorbed and angry at life to contemplate the number of people I was
pushing away from me. Now, I'm ready to start again. If you'll take me
back..."

She reached up and pulled his face close for a kiss. He responded by
picking her up and spinning her around while never breaking the kiss. It
was a moment right out of the movies........

"Chris" his caregiver called from downstairs "we're gonna be late for your
neuro appointment. Do you need some help getting ready?"

"Will you just give me a friggin' second! I'm getting there" he yelled back
as he sat twisting and grimacing on the edge of his hospital bed, his socks
half way on his feet, his shirt and pants hanging on a nearby chair mocking
his efforts. He knew that eventually the caregiver would come to dress him
and dry his tears.

He knocked over his plastic drinking cup, spilling juice all over himself.
He began to sob. He only had dreams and memories of how things used to be.
His arms flailed about as he tried to direct his muscles to
cooperate. His caregiver, hearing the commotion from downstairs, took a
deep breath, and entered the room. "You're just having a difficult time
right now, Chris" he said as he helped him to his feet.

Trying to be light-hearted he asked Chris "May I have this dance?" This
time, it was a long while before he could stop crying.