Just looked out the window and realized a full moon
was shining over my shoulder while I sat at my
computer. Gonna' go out and look at it.     Carole H.

--- janet paterson <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> hi all
>
> >At 19:24 1999/09/24 -0700, cyber-dad Don wrote:
> >>i am not sure if this should have been NONPD:
> >>so list and my cyber-daughter, i hope i am doing
> right.
>
> as far as i am concerned
> you can [almost] do no wrong!
>
> i make a point of reading every single message you
> send in
> regardless of the subject or the topic or whatever
> and i am sure that i am not alone in this
>
> >>how to start?  as they say in book writing, start
> at the beginning.
> >>i may repeat myself. mom (VIVIAN) and i had a long
> talk again.
> >>yes, i have been very upset. why - i don't know.
> >>my neuro is away on a trip. mom called his head
> nurse.
> >>as all nurses know, a lot of them know the doc's
> patients
> >>about as well as the doc's do.
> >>they both say my PD is getting worse,though i'm
> not dying from it.
> >>i'm just like a lot of PWP'S who ARE IN DENIAL.
> >>she said i was regressing.
> >>[i can't think of the word but am going
> backwards].
> >>i used to be the one who could do 'anything'
> >>and what i did not know was 'not worth knowing'.
> >>i cry a lot about how i can't do this or that.
> >>i don't want to admit i have trouble in walking or
> doing any thing.
> >>when someone needed help i was there.
> >>now that i can't be first, i cry.
>
> could it be the moon?
> everyone seems to be 'prickley' these days
> extra sensitive extra emotional
> but that might just be pd
>
> you didn't have a very good time at that dinner
> were you disappointed that you had to leave early?
> were you mad at yourself?
>
> if it had been someone else who choked on their
> chicken
> would you be mad at them?
>
> you say you are crying about the things you can't do
> you know that that is the old grungy filter
> that mr pd has on his glasses
> he never cleans the darn things
> he goes wallowing in the mud
> gets his lenses all grimy
> and then complains that the day looks dreary
>
> how about a good scrub
> so you can see the things you ***can*** do
> for a change?
>
> like write a heart-spilling letter like you just did
> do you know how many people cannot do that?
> too afraid to 'look vulnerable'?
> too afraid of seeming 'weak'?
>
> i personally think
> that the things you know and are learning now
> are the things that are truly 'worth knowing'
>
> the other stuff is just ego flaunting
> or what i have dubbed 'willie waving'
> [yikes i can't believe i said that!]
>
> >>i have tried to tell PWP'S. we are still people
> with feelings.
> >>but i don't want anyone's pity. this i have got to
> do for myself.
>
> it's one thing to feel too proud for pity
> but allowing others to at least empathize with you
> is a generous sharing of your humanity
>
> we none of us are perfect now
> or ever will be
> no point in wasting energy pretending we are
> or whining that 'we should be'
>
> >>i did not know the LIST was picking up on it. mom
> has.
> >>she is trying to get me to be the old DON and look
> after myself.
> >>you see CG have it worries time with PD than us. i
> forgot that.
> >>i am trying to figure out why one minute i am ok,
> and then an hour
> >>later i'm not. i was talking to BERN . HE PICKED
> UP ON IT AS WELL
> >>AS a LOT OF MY VERY VERY GOOD LIST FAMILY have
> picked up on it.
> >>my life is to help all PWP'S in my own way from my
> heart.
> >>JOAN HOW CAN'T SPELL HER NAME? Joan Snyder has
> made me feel good
> >>because of the posts i got from her.
> >>at one time i could look the big wheels in the
> face
> >>and read the riot act to them.
>
> and just what do you think you are doing now?
> the big wheels have changed into your cyber-kin
> and we are gaining the benefit of your e-mails to us
> your words touch us all
> in a way  that is much more powerful
> than a rip-snortin lecture
>
>
> >>CAMILLA at the end of your post, i think in your
> polite way
> >>are tryng to tell me something.
> >>i know i will win over this PD.
> >>with the LIST & with VIVIAN'S HELP i will
> >>and i pray i will be DON once more.
> >>so let's all be allowed to say what we want
> >>and let it settle in the dust and let the rain
> take care of it.
>
> i love this image
> have you been taking secret poetry lessons?
>
> >>i have been here for an hour trying what to figure
> out what to say.
> >>it's really nothing of importance. i've just got
> to talk.
> >>with so many that are having their own worries
> with PD,
> >>I should just shut up.
>
> no, you 'shouldn't'
> i'm glad you didn't
>
>
> with mush love
>
> sis
>
>
>
> >>I.Y.Q.
> >>DON  AND  VIVIAN
> >>LOVE OF MY LIFE FOR 54 YEARS
> >>
> >>BEST MEDS FOR PD
> >>IS
> >>FOR IT IS IN GIVING THAT WE RECEIVE
> >>
> >><[log in to unmask]>
> >>
> >><http://www.2wcoil.com/~flash>
> >
> janet paterson
> 52 now / 41 dx / 37 onset
> 613 256 8340 po box 171 almonte ontario canada K0A
> 1A0
> a new voice:
> <http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Village/6263/>
> <[log in to unmask]>
>



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